Mrs Negative

Mrs Negative embraces her tardy Positive. Life after IVF and loving the son I never thought I'd have.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

I Did.......

I did......buy a HPT.
I did......pee on a stick.
I did......see one line.
I did......jam that stinking thing into the rubbish bin.
I did......get more cramps.
I did......begin bleeding this morning.
I did......cry my eyes out.
I did......cuddle my husband and curse the world.
I did......not want it to end this way.

But, it did.

I thought of you all through my own dark moment.
My twisted sisters.
And I knew you'd be here to help me through. Hug?

41 Comments:

Blogger Bugsy said...

Oh honey. I am so sorry. That stinking HPT! That is just the worst thing ever. I am so so sorry. I hope you are okay. Please take time to recoup. Oh sweetie. I so wish there was something I could do for you.

Please know I am here. I understand your pain. I feel the sense of loss, the futility, the total injustice. and I am sitting here having a good cry for you.

This just sucks!

2/3/06  
Blogger heleen said...

So sorry to hear this time it didn't work. I've been thinking about you lots.....

2/3/06  
Anonymous thalia said...

Ugh I'm so sorry Mony. I remember feeling those cramps and seeing the bleeding and it was just so incredibly disappointing. I'm sorry.

2/3/06  
Blogger N said...

Oooo I am so so sad for you! It looked so god, but you don't have control over it! I am really so sorry! I am sending you a huge hug from Sweden (maybe you ned some cooling...here it is very cold).

{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Nina

2/3/06  
Anonymous Carrie P said...

From a lurker - I'm so sorry to hear this, I really was hoping for you.

2/3/06  
Blogger Mrs. T said...

So sorry to read this. That just sucks...

3/3/06  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I came to your site today to check on you and gasped out loud. I am so very, very sorry and am thinking of you.

3/3/06  
Blogger Mellie said...

Oh my dear, dear Mony. I am SO SO SO sorry. That was not the way it was supposed to go down. DAMN DAMN DAMN. Keep cuddling the husband and cursing the world. It's just not fair. I wish I could hug you for real but do consider yourself virtually locked in a bear hug.

3/3/06  
Anonymous Orodemniades said...

*hugses*

3/3/06  
Blogger Milenka said...

Oh, sweetie, I am so sorry. *hugs*

3/3/06  
Anonymous T said...

I'm so very, very sorry.

3/3/06  
Anonymous mm said...

Oh fuck it all. I'm so very sorry.

3/3/06  
Blogger Millie said...

I'm just so very very sorry. Thinking of you.

3/3/06  
Anonymous llama said...

Shit Mony... I'm so sorry... Lots of virtual hugs coming your way.

I got my period yesterday too and I was hoping that you were still hanging in there....

Damn all this shit, babe.

3/3/06  
Blogger Just another Jenny said...

{{{hugs}}} Sending snow covered soft white hugs from Canada.
I am just so sorry.
Please be good to yourself.
I am so sad as I read this. Maybe it's the PMS but now I'm crying too. Damn BFN:(

3/3/06  
Blogger Winnifred said...

nother hug from Canada...

THIS SUCKS. AAAAAARHHHH. it's not supposed to be like this :(

aaaaaaaaaarrhhhhhhh.

i know - it's not helping you... hugs hugs hugs and take care of yourself...

3/3/06  
Blogger Sparkle said...

Oh bugger, so sorry.
There's just no rhyme or reason to this.
Take care.

3/3/06  
Blogger Dramalish said...

Smotheringly big hug.

I'm sorry, Mony. I've been thinking of you lots and so wanted you to have different news for this post.

-D.

3/3/06  
Blogger Julie said...

I'm so sorry!

3/3/06  
Blogger LabiaLady said...

Oh Mony,
I am so sorry. Nothing I can say will make the hurt go away... but know this, you are not alone ... the internets are there for you... all day and all night if need be..

LL

3/3/06  
Blogger EJW said...

Big group hug, extra tight from those of us also on CD1. I'm so sorry.

4/3/06  
Blogger Beth said...

Mony, I am so very sorry. Thinking of you.

4/3/06  
Blogger seattlegal said...

From another lurker - big hugs to you. I am so, so sorry!

4/3/06  
Blogger Spanglish said...

Not fair. :(
Hugs.
I wish it had turned out differently.

4/3/06  
Anonymous kiwi said...

I am so sorry. Big hugs to you.

5/3/06  
Blogger Em said...

Virtual hugs to you. I was thinking about you the last few days. Those pee sticks suck but eventually, you WILL get one that gives you two lines.

5/3/06  
Blogger Lut C. said...

This is just so unfair. All that effort and hope, all crushed. I'm so sorry this has happened.

5/3/06  
Blogger gnome said...

Sorry, hugs from another ozzie girl on the IF journey.

5/3/06  
Blogger Pamplemousse said...

Huggies all round as it sucks.

5/3/06  
Anonymous thalia said...

I'm so sorry Mony. It does suck the big hairy ones.

6/3/06  
Blogger Fertility Faux Pas said...

Mony, I'm so very sorry. We're always here to help you through in any way we can. Thinking of you...

7/3/06  
Blogger Ova Girl said...

Oh Mony I'm so sorry. Hugs galore.

7/3/06  
Blogger Just another Jenny said...

I can't believe that with all you are going through you are still out there in blogger land giving us all support.

I can imagine that you are the type of girl that everybody wants to be friends with. I bet your friends love you.

I hope you are taking care of yourself. I've been thinking about you and I'm sending good thoughts your way.

8/3/06  
Blogger Mel said...

{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}

I am sorry for your loss. It really does SUCK. You are in my thoughts.

8/3/06  
Blogger heleen said...

Hey Mony,
thanks hon... I wasn't finished with that post, so go check my other pics! Still thinking about you. Hope the pain is going away a little. When can you try your frozen embs?

8/3/06  
Anonymous wessel said...

A little late getting here, but just wanted to say how sorry I am for this disappointment. :-(

12/3/06  
Blogger Allison said...

I'm so sorry... hang in there sweetie.

12/3/06  
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