This weekend, I spent time with some of our closest friends. A big group of us sat in the backyard, got a great fire going, rounded up comfy chairs in a circle & drank, laughed, sang..Peter even got the guitar out & we made it backyard musical. I felt like a teenager! One of the couples in our "gang" are expecting their first baby. She is 25 weeks along & is just starting to really "Look" pregnant. The bump is really noticeable. We spoke about her pregnancy & the baby & the all the changes happening with her body. She is a really special girl, she knows all about our infertility. She realises how seeing her fall pregnant easily & now growing before my eyes must be quite painful for us. I totally love the way she understands. I have never felt uneasy around her, envious? Yes. But I'm sure there are things about my life that she envies too. I am so happy that having pregnant ladies & little kids in my face doesn't reduce me to mush. Once upon a time, it would have. Years ago I probably would have opted to stay at home. Spared myself. I would have missed out on all the fun rather than join my friends. I would have avoided seeing the pregnant belly, because it would make me so depressed. I am so glad those days are behind me. Yes, the envy hangs over me, but it doesn't overshadow the happiness I feel for her. Thank god for all of us.