Mrs Negative

Mrs Negative embraces her tardy Positive. Life after IVF and loving the son I never thought I'd have.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

The Bad Nurse.

Cooper is 2 weeks old today.
It hasn't passed quickly. It feels like an eternity since he arrived. Maybe the trips to the NICU are getting me down. Maybe.

The staff who work with Cooper are amazing. Men & Women who exude care, love & professionalism. They coo at the babies, they talk to the parents with concern & respect & they leave me full of amazement & confidence that Cooper is getting all the care he needs while I am not there. They handle the babies with such ease & flair, I marvel at it. They pick the babes up with a technique I call "The Clamp". They put a hand around the head & a hand on the buttocks & clamp down, raising Cooper out of the cot with one felled movement. I struggle to even re-position Cooper on my chest for fear of breaking him & also because there is barely enough flesh to grip onto.

However, I encountered my first asshole nurse this week. And I seriously wanted to scissor kick her in the head. Only my fresh c-section wound stopped me.
She spoke to me like I was 5 years old & so started a condescending tirade of advice & nitpicking that really spoiled my visit.
Here is a list of the things that I did unto her liking:

I put my handbag in the wrong place.
I wore a watch.
I folded his nappy wrong.
I didn't wash my hands enough.
I didn't use the rubbish bin correctly.
I wiped his eyes wrong.
I fed him wrong.
I hadn't signed up to feeding classes (never knew about them)
I didn't hold his feet right when changing nappy.
I didn't hold his legs right when wiping.
I used alcohol to clean my hands (they provide it)
I refused to have his booties on.

etc, etc, etc.

Sheesh bitch. How will Cooper ever survive when I bring him home on my own? The thing that really upset me was her tone & the way she veiled all the negative comments with an air of superiority. I know that she knows a whole lot more about newborns than me....but I feel she wasn't "teaching" me rather she was suffocating my confidence.

She then changed Cooper's feeding tube (which I HATE seeing) it makes him cry & pointed out that the last nurse pushed his tube too far down his nose, probably causing him discomfort. Thanks, really wanted to know that.

Barbara, you're a dog. Probably very good at what you do, but a first class asshat. I hope you never look after my son again.

Saturday, October 27, 2007


*Updated With Stats*

A few of you wanted birth stats....I am willing & able to oblige!
Cooper Tait arrived at 2.17 pm on Oct 17th. He weighed 1.74 kilo's and measured 44.5 cms long.
He has a strawberry birthmark that starts on his right knee & spirals up around his thigh to sprinkle on his buttocks. It is faint & charming. I hope it doesn't bother him as he grows older. "Tait" is Peter's mother's maiden name. We chose to honour her for lots of reasons. Since her stroke last year, she has been blind. It breaks our hearts to know she will never see her new grandson.
Cooper cried as soon as he was delivered. I was gobsmacked to discover a son...instead of the daughter I'd believed 'Hef' to be.
I had an epidural block. Unfortunately, a section of my bowel was cut during the c-section & I had to have a general anaesthetic while another doctor repaired that (as the spinal block wore off I could FEEL them working on me) that terrified me & I panicked. I woke up in recovery 3 hours later. On my way from recovery to Maternity they pushed my bed via the NICU where I was allowed to reach into Cooper's humidicrib & touch his feet.
Natural childbirth must be agonising but I tell you a c-section hurts like a motherfucker in the days after too!

*end update*

..despite our car overheating on the freeway enroute to visit Cooper, we were undeterred! We limped home, swapped cars & continued our journey! Damn it! Daddy had a cuddle appointment!

And we got the goods., so good.

The smallest steps...

Peter watched Cooper sleeping the other night and commented "I just want to kiss him.." Oh. It was such a sweet moment. Peter is still waiting for his first cuddle, something that we hope will finally happen today.

When I arrived at the NICU yesterday I was floored to see my little man out of his humidicrib and in a hot cot! Basically it is an open top BIG BOY'S bed! A heated water mattress had him lulling like a......well, a baby! He even had a jacket & beanie on. I lost my shit at the sweetness! If he can maintain his own body temperature in the hot cot, he can stay there. It means we can touch him, pester him, kiss toes & pop dummies in with greater ease. He is now taking 8 mils of milk every 2 hours. News that has my tits in a twist because I am only producing just enough milk to cope! I am hiring an electric breast pump today to help keep up demand.

I am so thrilled with his progress. I changed my first shitty nappy yesterday, what a messy, happy task! Then I got to cuddle Cooper for an hour and 20 minutes. He completely wrapped his little body around my torso, tiny legs almost doing the splits, spread eagled around my hips.
We held hands.
I think he likes me.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

My Son, Cooper...

I was discharged from hospital yesterday.
I am glad to be home. My God. My mind still hasn't processed what has happened. It has been a terrifying, agonising, exhilerating time. Thanks to Kay for such a beautiful entry I cry everytime I read her post.
Our darling son will be staying in special care for abut 5 weeks. I have held him on 3 occasions. He can only come out of the crib when well enough. He is breathing on his own, he has bouts of jaundice, bouts of Nil By Mouth...but today is back on milk (1 mil every 4 hours) which seems insane, but all his little tummy can process.

I will travel to the hospital as often as my health allows to deliver his milk & gaze upon his perfect being. I am being as strong & sensible as I can. Knowing he is in tremendous hands, even though they are not my own.

Although we still wait...He is here.
And the love that Peter & I feel for Cooper has altered our lives forever.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

IT'S A BOY!!!!

Yes!!! You read right!!!
It's Kay here...Mony's BFF!!!
And I have been given the great honour of announcing the arrival of Baby Cooper to Mony's "other family" - you guys!!!

Mony was admitted to hospital a week ago suffering a horrid kidney blockage thanks to the then "Hef" who decided to lodge himself in a very awkward position...unfortunately her kidney function did not return to normal as we had hoped and after much deliberation - it was decided that the baby would be delivered this week...

As you would all know Mony was only 32 weeks so she has spent a very anxious few days making preparations as best she could for an early delivery...she was given a course of steroids to help form a protective lining inside the the baby's lungs & make it less painful for him when he gave his first little cry...She was advised yesterday that she was booked in for a c-section & would be given an epidural block so that she could be awake for the birth...

I spent a lovely couple of hours with Mony, her Mum & her Aunty last night - and she was in great spirits...she was of course worried that little Hef was going to be 8 weeks premmie & dissappointed that she wouldn't be able to take her baby home with her like most mums do...but she was also excited about the prospect of her dream finally coming to fruition - the dream of being a Mother.

And this afternoon Mony delivered a beautiful baby boy - Cooper Tait - our little miracle boy!!! An absoulute gift from the heavens!!!

I don't have any other details to pass on at this stage other than to say that both Mony & Cooper are doing was estimated that little Cooper would probably weigh in at around 1.4 kgs (approx 3pounds), but as yet I don't have a confirmed weight or any other stats!!! Rest assured though that I will pass on all the details as soon as they come to hand...

She was so determined that you guys should all be kept up to date with what was happening - and I am so thrilled to be able to share this happy news with you all...This blog has been such a comfort to Simone, and I know that like me, many of you have laughed & cried at her beautifully written posts...sharing her often heart wrenching journey along the road to motherhood every step of the way...I would like to thank you all for the support & strength you have given her - I know it has made such a difference.

So that's all for now...I'll be back asap with all the juicy details - and maybe even some pics - if I can work out how to put them up here!!! Ha!! I'm a bit of novice at this whole blogging business!!!

Bye for now,
Aunty Kay xx

Thursday, October 04, 2007


I've got 2 words for you Kimmie.
Compression. Stockings.

Oh heaven. Fat cankle/sausage toes begone! I invested in a pair of compression stockings & the relief is immense. I thoroughly recommend them to any swollen ankle sister.

....and joy! it's so wonderful when good news abounds.
Congrats dear hearts!