The Bad Nurse.
Cooper is 2 weeks old today.
It hasn't passed quickly. It feels like an eternity since he arrived. Maybe the trips to the NICU are getting me down. Maybe.
The staff who work with Cooper are amazing. Men & Women who exude care, love & professionalism. They coo at the babies, they talk to the parents with concern & respect & they leave me full of amazement & confidence that Cooper is getting all the care he needs while I am not there. They handle the babies with such ease & flair, I marvel at it. They pick the babes up with a technique I call "The Clamp". They put a hand around the head & a hand on the buttocks & clamp down, raising Cooper out of the cot with one felled movement. I struggle to even re-position Cooper on my chest for fear of breaking him & also because there is barely enough flesh to grip onto.
However, I encountered my first asshole nurse this week. And I seriously wanted to scissor kick her in the head. Only my fresh c-section wound stopped me.
She spoke to me like I was 5 years old & so started a condescending tirade of advice & nitpicking that really spoiled my visit.
Here is a list of the things that I did unto her liking:
I put my handbag in the wrong place.
I wore a watch.
I folded his nappy wrong.
I didn't wash my hands enough.
I didn't use the rubbish bin correctly.
I wiped his eyes wrong.
I fed him wrong.
I hadn't signed up to feeding classes (never knew about them)
I didn't hold his feet right when changing nappy.
I didn't hold his legs right when wiping.
I used alcohol to clean my hands (they provide it)
I refused to have his booties on.
etc, etc, etc.
Sheesh bitch. How will Cooper ever survive when I bring him home on my own? The thing that really upset me was her tone & the way she veiled all the negative comments with an air of superiority. I know that she knows a whole lot more about newborns than me....but I feel she wasn't "teaching" me rather she was suffocating my confidence.
She then changed Cooper's feeding tube (which I HATE seeing) it makes him cry & pointed out that the last nurse pushed his tube too far down his nose, probably causing him discomfort. Thanks, really wanted to know that.
Barbara, you're a dog. Probably very good at what you do, but a first class asshat. I hope you never look after my son again.